Many authors with book titles that look wonderful on the cover (and because they’re really good titles to begin with) often slip into acronym-speak when blogging and interviewing about their books. I’m giving in to the pressure of this acronym-frenetic world and will now, occasionally, refer to my debut novel as SOTFOG only because it actually looks and sounds good in that form. Or so I think.

Took some vacation time off from my new novel to write another degenerate pulpy crime fiction short story called Dirty Pool. It’s equal parts predator, coal country bowling, small town crime, and comeuppance. It geminated from a suggestion I made to my wife’s friend when they were looking for a catchy name for their women’s bowling team (my suggestion of “Lethal Women” did it for them), its members big fans of Mel Gibson back before his momentary lapses of political incorrectness. After I process feedback on the story it will make the rounds, hopefully finding a published home somewhere this fall or winter.

Look for my pulpy short story You’re A Moron in DEMOLITION crime magazine’s Fall issue due to come out sometime in September. This story was also accepted by THUGLIT publisher Todd Robinson (”Big Daddy Thug”) but DEMOLITION was quicker on the trigger with their response.

Supposedly I’m done my edits for SCARS. I nudged the editor over the weekend re when her/our finishing touches are going to the publisher for final review, haven’t heard back yet. Still no date on print publication–it’s sometime after November–and we’re now past the month (July) the ebook was supposed to be released. I know the folks at Drollerie are swamped since the publisher just closed the press to new submissions. Just getting itchy about this, you know? Looking to see my name on the publisher’s “Author” list and the novel out there getting reviewed, read, and we hope enjoyed… by millions. (Fine; so the “read by millions” is the unrealistic dream part. If that’s what I really believe, I’ve been writing fiction for the wrong reasons.)

Had a great time with published authors Jonathan Maberry, Greg Frost, Marie Lamba, soon-to-be published author Dennis Tafoya (Dope Thief), other folks interested in the craft. Good exchanges, great insights, a fun way to network and mucho glad I was invited.

Sorry, headline isn’t for me or any new submission of mine. My publisher Drollerie Press is having a July 4th 10% off sale. Go. Buy. Tell your friends to do the same.

I jokingly tell friends that my SCARS/DEVIL’S BIBLE manuscript is cursed. Not in the way most of us aspiring, hope-to-be published novelists think all our manuscripts are cursed, where agents and editors back away from them when delivered to their doorsteps, crucifixes and wolfbane raised high, most of them clearly part of that publising industry cult whose rules preclude having relations with the industry’s virgins. Nope, my manuscript should possibly display a warning from the Surgeon General: “This manuscript is a known carrier of pain and suffering. Handle at your own risk.”

Its history to date:

Many, many queries to agents. One of them, inclusive of a few chapters, I sent on, yes, Halloween. The agent died weeks later.

I discovered this after a second agent at this agency requested the entire manuscript; many months later she requested a full rewrite. After two months of revisions followed by three further months of agency review, the agency’s interest died. In fairness to me and the agency, I was told I could submit other material.

I eventually found the wonderful small publisher Drollerie Press with Deena Fisher, a gifted, genuinely accommodating person, at the helm. Ms. Fisher found the manuscript to be terrific (”I couldn’t stop reading. Holy cow,  what a roller coaster ….”) and offered me a contract. Woo-hoo!

She assigned it to an editor; the editor got sick. She assigned it to a second editor; the second editor got sick. (Relax. Both editors are recovering from their ills and back to work.)

So here we are. My newest editing partner in this endeavor, Drollerie’s Lisa Pett (”three’s a charm!”), I suspect does not know the manuscript’s toxic history, maybe also doesn’t know the history of the real-life legend behind the 800-hundred-year-old religious artifact DEVIL’S BIBLE that my manuscript exploits. (Yep, the Devil helped a monk write it. In one night. 624 pages, some with pictures. Swear to God.) (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Devil%27s_Bible)

I recommend lots of orange juice and vitamins, Lisa. Please. Wouldn’t hurt to keep a crucifix handy as well.

I just learned that You’re A Moron, a pulpy short story I asked one of my writers’ groups to critique a few meetings ago, was accepted by the crime fiction e-zine DEMOLITION (http://www.demolitionmag.com/) for publication in its Fall 2008 issue, available sometime in September. It will be my first published short story so yeah, I’m feeling pretty damn good, thanks for asking.

I was immensely entertained by Mr. Shilstone’s debut novel CHANCE (Breakaway Books, 1996), ostensibly an authorized biography of the greatest baseball shortstop of all time, a fictional Hall-of-Fame ballplayer named Chance Cain. I want to read more of his stuff, can find nothing else from this talented author. I won’t review the novel here. There are some very complimentary and wonderful reviews on Amazon—even one by the author’s son that hit the mark for me—but I will mention I’ve read the novel more than twice because of its wit, charm, and a gritty first-person narrator who dubs himself a “weird old guy poet.” The first-person voice of another fictional character, Wump Hozer, someone I am particularly fond of since I created him, was influenced in no small measure by the wonderful unpretentious voice Mr. Shilstone gave the teller of his story. If you run across other fiction by Steve Shilstone, or have any updates on what Mr. Shilstone is up to nowadays, please pass along this info. I want to be entertained by him again. Email me at cntbauer101 at yahoo (dot) com.

Yesterday we bussed into NYC to see the ten-year-old hit and I was really, really impressed. Stage, scenes, costumes, gadgetry, voices. Wow. A stunner. We experienced a very touching moment when the character Nala, young adult girlfriend to Simba the future Lion King, came onstage and sang the lights out during one solo. For this performanace Nala was played by an understudy. During the solo I was tapped on the arm by the woman in the seat next to me. She volunteered that “Nala” was daughter to the man sitting next to her (her friend, husband, or brother; I never confirmed which), and Nala’s Dad was crying. For me it was an unscripted moment that nearly eclipsed the show.

My first blog post, folks.

Just learned which Drollerie Press editor was been assigned to edit my novel: Amy Garvey. Accomplished novelist as well as an editor, has impressive credentials and an attractive, clever website. We haven’t met yet. I did read a short story of hers on the Drollerie website. Very impressive. Check it out for yourself; a free read. Then check out other stuff on the site as well, maybe buy something. Authors and their publishers like it when you do that.